Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
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she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
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If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
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