the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, jail baloney is awful.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize