oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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