Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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