My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize