just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
