Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize