Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
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