also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize