I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
My pussy is not your playground.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Randomize
