This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
