I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
