Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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