she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
party gras won. party gras always wins.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Randomize
