Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
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