Acid is not a monday night drug
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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