that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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