i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
