So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
