I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
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