So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize