Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
