why didn't you poke me back
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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