We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Randomize
