i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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