i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
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