Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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