i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
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