THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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