ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Come see our sink grown plant.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
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I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
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