Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
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