I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Randomize
