There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Randomize
