Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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