Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize