weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
You were trust falling into bushes
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
