this is something i pride myself on being below average for
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I touched a dick in church today
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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