If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize