thus making me awesome and them whores
it was like eating out sand paper
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
