He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
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