My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Randomize
