Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Thank you for not boning my boss.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
