Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Randomize
