I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
