guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize