Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
