dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
no. you can't hotbox the world.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Randomize
