If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
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We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
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So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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