You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Fuck appropriateness.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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