hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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