Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I'm like, not good at living.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
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